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Lessons Learned: Reflections on Stripcabin

One week after this monumentally life-changing weekend, I’ve finally had the time and space to gather my thoughts. For most of the week, I’ve been feeling like my homegirl Rebecca Frederickson: “Somewhere on 58 between South Boston and Danville and crying from the depths of my soul,” she wrote a few days after the event, “I still haven’t words to describe what has happened to me because of Stripcabin…”

Whether in one of the Stripcraft Spellbook workshops, over a glass of wine in the hot tub, or sitting on the kitchen floor in tears, here are some of the lessons that I learned while opening my heart alongside other women at Stripcabin 2016.

Want to learn some of these lessons for yourself? Check out the source: the Stripcraft Spellbook, now on limited release through November 30th.

1. Comfort and fear work hand-in-hand to block us from our dreams.

Comfort in a familiar place, and fear of what will happen if we leave that place, keep many of us stuck in situations that drain our happiness. Jessica Anne explains how she finally decided to leave her comfort zone and make a real plan to change her life after attending Stripcabin:

“You lovely ladies have ruined me. I’ve been unhappy in my job for a while. The work environment is nice, but the work itself is draining and I dread every time the phone rings. Nothing has made me want to take up smoking or alcoholism like these calls. I had a ‘plan’ that was just, Save money until you can switch to part-time and train full-time. But that’s vague.

So thank you for ruining me–because now i want to make a real plan, with deadlines and budgets so that I can be out of here by next review period. Nothing like being one of the top tier workers that carry this department while others just watch sports all day on their monitors and maybe getting a whopping 47 cent raise every year.”

Only when we are brave enough to treat ourselves with dignity and demand what we are worth can we create more fulfilling lives.

stripcabin-mexicana

(PHOTO IS JESSICA ANNE, PHOTO BY CINDY JOHNSON)

2. Even the most inspired person sometimes needs outside inspiration…

and a strong community of badass women ready to support one another is the perfect place to find it. Finding friends who understands you, mirror your own greatness back upon yourself, as well as friends whom you support in turn can fill up your well of creativity and joy like nothing else.

As Liana Cabrera explains:

“What’s stuck with me most from this weekend wasn’t just seeing all of you beautiful women in your element, though that was part of it. What I can’t seem to shake is the exquisite joy of being seen. I’ve been terrified of allowing myself to be truly seen for so long, and now I don’t think I could live any other way. It’s unmatchable. I don’t think I realized how empty I was until you, my beautiful sisters, until I danced with you, talked with you, laughed with you, cried with you, until you all saw me and I saw you in a way that left us entirely bare to each other, physically and emotionally. You have filled me and I have a well to draw from again because of you. I love you, sisters. You have changed me. Thank you for existing and sharing your time with me.”

3. Even those who seem to “have it all” still experience the same human vulnerabilities. You are not alone.

stripcabin-dani-and-michelle

(PHOTO OF MICHELLE AND DANI BY CINDY JOHNSON)

Michelle Mynx is a business owner, world-renown performer, and pioneer of pole dancing. Most of our Stripcabin guests consider this woman a celebrity. However, even this accomplished and respected legend struggles with the same insecurities that we all share: the fear of not being enough, doing enough, being worthy of love and respect. Seeing this occur in even the most badass women allows us to not only offer our care to another, but moreover forgive these parts of ourselves. As Michelle shared after the event,

“I have so much love and gratitude for all of you! When Lux invited me to come be a part of this weekend and teach a class I was completely ecstatically thrilled! Of course I adore her, she’s one of my dearest friends, and I was elated at the idea of being at Stripcabin again. But I struggle deeply with imposter syndrome and fear of success/fear of failure and I found myself incredibly fearful of not being enough or saying enough or doing enough or teaching enough to make my presence worth it for all of you. I was excited to give you as much as I could and I hope that I did that. What I didn’t realize until I was in the midst of it was that I was going to have to do all the same things that you were going to have to do. I am used to giving that as much as I can to all of my students and the people around me, but I’m not used to receiving it in return. And not necessarily because people don’t try. I have a really hard time allowing myself to be nurtured from others and allowing myself to break down as needed as well. So thank you so much to all of you for accepting my love and my teachings but also making me feel safe to be vulnerable and to cry and to share with you as well. I love all of you so much!”

4. Curate your squad for the goal of joint slayage.

Surround yourself with friends whom you admire. Keep company with folks who admire you, right back. Create a group of diverse badasses ready to support one another. This network is one of your primary tools of power. Only through collaboration with other badass women have I ever been able to produce my best work.

As my Scottish mate Vee recounts of the weekend,

“God, you guys. I didn’t known it could be like this. I have awesome female friends and I’ve been to nice ‘women’s circles’ and actually my training group for therapy is nearly all women… and I still didn’t know it could be like that. I didn’t know we could be like that for each other. That there are alternate ways of building communities, being vulnerable, being sexual.

5. Good intentions are lovely–but only action inspires change.

 

Making a plan is only the first step. Actual action is how you will cause real change in your life.

As our Canadian homegirl Catherine recounts after returning from Stripcabin:

“I feel the waves of positive change in my life already. Aside from the usual Monday of corporate working-from-home by day and hitting my pole studio at night, yesterday I embarked on the following as well, because Stripcabin has finally inspired me to properly up my game…

I saw a new physiotherapist to take care of the hamstring I pulled while dancing on Friday night, 12 hours before the workshops started. Last year I had the same injury on the other side but failed to see a physio for a few months, allowing it to turn into a chronic issue. But fuck it, I love myself enough to not make the same damn mistake again and am taking care of this immediately.”

Or, as another of our anonymous Stripcabin guests recounts, “I spent more time chatting up my crush after I returned home,” because “life’s too short to sabotage yourself!”

The best intentions are lovely, but only action causes change in your life. Don’t simply plan–act.

Want to learn these lessons, and more? Want to join a sisterhood of like-minded women in the pursuit of real change? Want to be your most badass self?

Then join the revolution at Stripcraft Spellbook. This offer will only be available through November 30th.

Want to be part of a Stripbcabin retreat? Good news–Lux will be hosting more of these, globally. Keep an eye on the blog or join the newsletter for the earliest announcements.

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